Category: motherhood

For an Instant Birthday Party.

~ emetroka ~ Leave a comment

Last week was Benny’s fourth birthday. Seems like eons ago already as it passed in the blink of an eye. I was also in the throes of a nasty fever (chills! swollen throat! a general lump of lethargy!), so I feel like I didn’t get to really enjoy the day with him. I didn’t even have cake! Almost sacrilegious. A big giant *praise hands* that my parents were still here and they and my husband could save the day. Actually though, the entire last year passed in pretty much the blink of an eye too. I’m left asking myself questions like – didn’t I just birth Ben just yesterday? And now he’s going to be in pre-k next year? What? I feel like that a robot that moves its arms around saying “DoEs NoT cOmPuTe” over and over. I guess it just goes to show that that old saying holds true – the days are long, but the years are short. I’m actually not here today to wax poetic about my kids getting bigger (insert sob) or how it’s all going too fast (insert fist shaking at the sky) though I could go on about those things for a mile. I AM here to bring you a simple little idea to make birthdays a bit easier.

I thought of this trick when Charlie was just a tiny guy, but it just so happens that all three of our kids have middle-of-the-school-year (two in October and one in March) birthdays which can mean *STRESS* setting in a few days before. That’s right around when it hits me that I need to somehow bake a cake in the middle of the week, pick up cupcakes for their class party, make their favorite meal, buy them presents, wrap them, and generally make their day filled to the brim with magic without myself becoming a stress ball mom trying to soak up the memories all while telling everyone who will listen how very busy I am – my biggest mom pet peeve. Ha! No short order.

So hear me out. It doesn’t solve all my birthday struggles, but at least one answer to this middle-of-the-week-school-year quandary is – The Birthday Box. Our birthday box is…just a shoebox. I should think about an upgrade at some point, but honestly the shoebox has been working for us for a very long time, so why overcomplicate a good thing? Okay, other than that time when we moved and I became panicked when I couldn’t find The Birthday Box. I was convinced that my husband had thrown it away – it being a shoebox and all. But it turned up (I think in the garage?) after a few prayers to Saint Anthony. Phew! But that’s also why it now says *do not throw away* in very emphatic writing. Anyway, the night before The-Birth-Day we just pull the box out, and decorate the dining room with abandon – setting hats out at each spot, hanging garland, inserting the age in the birthday crown, and blowing up balloons. Instant party. You should see the look on the boys’ faces when they get up in the morning. Pure childhood magic. And after each birthday, I just make a little list and restock the box if needed. Just makes life a little easier.

A list to build your own Birthday Box:

Other things to make birthdays special:

Just making things a little easier in any way we can. Do you have any ideas to make birthdays a little smoother? I’d love to hear if you do!

How To Read More.

~ emetroka ~ 2 Comments

One thing I’m often asked is “How do you read so much?” It’s true that I do work full time as a teacher, have three small children, cook dinner every night, and keep the house looking fresh (most of the time). Now friends, it would be laughable to list all those things without saying that I have a hugely present and supportive spouse who is my partner in all things of life. It’s not like I’m doing “it all” alone. But in between doing “it all” with my sweet husband, it’s true that I will forever find time to read. Every day, no matter what. Now, listing all those things sounds a little braggy – Look how productive I am! Look how full my life is!” But I don’t meant it that way in a bit. I just mean, that you can do it too, even if you feel like you have a list of to do’s that never get done (we all do), even if you have a small child hanging off of you (me too!), a partner you want to give your undivided attention to at the end of the day, or a kid who desperately needs you in the next room (MAMA MAMA!). You could find time.

  • Choose a book over scrolling. I am definitely a creator online, but I am not much of a consumer. I have maybe 4-5 people I like to look at on instagram, and I give myself 15 minutes every night to scroll Pinterest, but other than that – I don’t watch reels, I don’t scroll feeds. I don’t watch stories like a tv show. Put the phone down, and pick up a book instead.
  • Get multiple versions of the same book – get the print copy, the audio, and the e-book. I mostly do a combination of listening to books (while shelving, driving, or running) and reading the print copy (at night, in bed, on the couch, or while monitoring my kids). And for goodness sake – don’t pay for any of it! Get them all from the library. It seems greedy to use all of the versions, but if no one has it checked out then you should. Libraries buy books so that people will use them. Just return as soon as you are done and you don’t have to feel guilty.
  • Bring your book with you wherever you go. Get a purse or backpack large enough to carry the print copy. Or learn to enjoy reading the e-book version.
  • Place holds at the library. I just shared a long list of holds that I have at the library. Having a stack of books that you’re excited to read always helps.
  • Only read good books. Now…by this I mean – Put a book down if you’re not interested. No one is giving awards for finishing books in adulthood. If you’re not into it, move on.
  • Read whenever you have a moment. Waiting for the pasta water to boil? Pick up your book. Waiting in the school pick up line? Pick up your book. Kids have soccer practice? Pick up your book.
  • Try not to reserve your reading time only to when you know you won’t be interrupted. After school, I generally get dinner going and then I take the boys out to play and bring my book with me. I know that they’re going to need help, and that I may only get two pages read, but it’s still reading time. Who knows – maybe you’ll get through a whole chapter!
  • Read instead of watch tv. This is similar to scrolling. You could choose to read a book instead of watch tv at night. My husband and I will watch a show together while folding laundry after the boys go to bed, but then I usually get my book out and he’ll switch to sports. I personally am not bothered by the tv being on when I’m reading, but I know that’s hard for some people. You could try to get your husband to read with you instead of watching tv! Or just go lay in bed!
  • If you work – read at lunch. Read at breakfast too! I have always brought my book to school with me and read while eating. It’s the half hour of my work day that centers, grounds and calms me. I look forward to it.
  • Get up early to read for a few minutes. Occasionally I am lucky enough to wake before the children and I will enjoy my first few sips of coffee with a quiet house, a simple breakfast and my book.

There you have it! My tips! I hope you find a pocket of your day for reading. Fit it in whenever and wherever you can. Reading and books are one of life’s greatest gifts in my very humble opinion.

On Mundane, Practical Resolutions and Making Them Happen.

~ emetroka ~ 2 Comments

Every new year I sit down and write a lengthy list of goals. Last year I did it stream of consciousness style on a Google doc. Most years past I’ve used a notebook to jot things down. Neither are a bad way to do it, and it’s always nice to read back through to see what I was working on last year.

But I’ve become a bit more methodical (in my old age) and typed up a big numbered list on google docs this year. 32 things! Eek! But I have to tell They’re not all hard. You might even look at it as part to do list, part list of goals. For example, one is “clean out my closet”, another is “repaint the back porch floor”, and “teach Charlie to ride a bike”. These are just (kind of mundane) tasks that really do need to be done and I can cross them off and not think about them again for a good long while. But others need a bit more doing. Things such as “run 6 miles without rest” and “read 80 books” and “find inspiration, but stop mindless scrolling”. This is all fine and good to say those things, but how do you get there? 

So this year, I took my list, and under each item I added “HOW?” And then I jotted down some notes for each.

How am I going to make sure that I make it to a yoga class each week? I need to communicate with my husband to see what night works with his schedule. I sent him a text to see for this week and went ahead and signed up for the class this week. Done

How am I going to make sure that we potty train Luke? Well I know that this summer would be ideal. If we do it in June then we’ll have a nice long chunk of time that we’re off school and we can just be home and near the potty. I wrote it in all caps in my planner.

How am I going to make sure not to buy any clothes new for me or the boys this year? I’m going to pick a day to thrift each week after school. 

If it helps you to see exactly what it looks like in my document, here are a couple:

  1. Do Duolingo every day.
    1. How?
      1. Pick a specific time and stay consistent.
      2. Set a reminder on my phone.
  2. Read 80 books.
    1. How?
      1. Aim for 2 books a week.
      2. Have books on hand at all times to read. Utilize audiobooks and e-books when needed. I should be able to read 2 books every week. This would be 104 books. This is something I do most weeks. Read before bed, audiobooks at school during shelving and on runs. 
      3. Post monthly reading posts on emetamily.com to summarize and help keep track. 
      4. Continue posting weekly reviews on instagram on Mondays to stay motivated.
      5. Continue placing holds and making weekly library stops.

And how to make sure I keep up with it all for the year? Well, I took a look at all of my goals and then I wrote a separate little list at the bottom of my document:

– Things to fit into every day: Workouts, Cooking, Meditate, Reading, Duolingo, Playing with the boys, etc.
– Things to fit into the week: Yoga, Library visit, Baking, Weekly Dates, etc.
– Things to fit into the month: Friend Dinners, cocktails with my sister, etc.
– Things to fit into my year: Knit a sweater, have our ceilings redone, sign the boys up for sports, power wash the house, etc.

This really helps me visualize when/how I’m going to get these things done. Is it reasonable? I already know it is because I’ve taken a look at my schedule and scheduled things in. Every day I’m going to do five minutes of Duolingo right when I wake up. I’m going to meditate for ten minutes right before I get in the shower every night. I’m going to a yoga session at 7:30pm tomorrow night. I read 70 books this year at a pretty leisurely pace, so I should be able to read 80 this year. We had a guy come yesterday to give us a quote for our ceilings and he’s going to begin work in the middle of the month. I’m going to ask my dad to paint the porch floor when they visit for the month of February. Boom. I’ve already made progress.

Really the only thing to do next is to form the habits. Dig in and stick to them. Stop being lazy, and really get nitty gritty with the details. Set an alarm on your phone every month “monthly check in!!” to hold yourself accountable. That’s the way to make sure you get stuff done. Just hold yourself to it. Don’t rely on someone to nag you. Make it your goal to keep your promises to yourself and just make it happen.

I remember when I started trying to figure out how to work, and be a mom, and still do things for myself. I was feeling very overwhelmed, so I wrote up a little schedule “An Ideal Week”. I wrote down all the half hours in the day and days of the week, and I filled in what I would ideally be doing each day at that time for an entire week. From 5:30-7pm I wanted to put my phone away and have family dinner and play with my kids. At 5am I wanted to be up and wanted to eat my breakfast, drink my coffee and be alone before I had to start getting ready for the day. On Sunday nights I wanted to have a check in with my husband on what his week is going to look like. And those are the things that to this day I do! That’s something you might try if you’re struggling with figuring out how to have time to do more for yourself and for your family. We all have the same amount of time in the day. We just all use it in different ways.

I also do think that my Making Every Day Special document that I made a few years ago might be helpful if you’re struggling to form home habits (like doing laundry every day, or celebrating minor and major holidays).

A Look Inside My Golden Coil Planner.

~ emetroka ~ Leave a comment

A post I’ve wanted to write for a while, but am just now getting around to. The overwhelm when it comes to trying to choose a functional, well laid out, everything I need in my life planner is a lot every year. I spent years making and printing my own planning sheets out because I just felt like most planners didn’t cover every base. But then Golden Coil came into my life. A fully customizable planner from front to back. If you just want exact details – scroll to the very bottom of this post and I walk you through exactly what I chose this year and what I’m doing differently next year.

What do I need in a planner?

  • a place for meal planning – longer than just a few lines. I like to have space to write down ideas for the next week, things to bake that week, things to drink, snacks to have on hand, breakfasts we’d like to have. A tiny little box just isn’t enough for me.
  • a place for social media planning – as my following has grown, I’ve needed more space to plan ahead, to jot down brainstorming, collaborations that are coming up, things to follow up on.
  • a place for home – with so much going on, I need space to jot down things we need for the boys at daycare, sports, things to pick up, etc.
  • a place for school planning – I like to see my weeks laid out in full calendar format and each week. We have a six day fine arts rotation so it gets confusing unless I have it all written out.
  • a place for to do lists – I am a list maker extraordinaire. It was nice to use my planner rather than trying to use a notebook and a planner. I still do use my notebook, but less than I used to! But with a planner that also has room for lists, I just have to have one book on hand.

I think I achieved pretty much everything I was looking for this year in my set up. The only thing I will change this year is my weekly spread and a few of the “add-on” pages. I thought it would be nice to have three squares – one for school, home and social media, but I didn’t end up using it as much as I thought I would. I chose a different spread for this year that I’m looking forward to seeing! I shared exact details at the bottom of this post!

Love the monthly spread. Shows you what is up for the month. You can’t change this selection in the planner. It comes standard.

This is an add on “month at a glance” page that I have at the beginning of each month. I use it to plan out blog posts, social media, and my monthly list. Below is a (halfway) filled in month.

The Ideas page is an add on that I have at the beginning of each month. It’s called “Brain Dump”. I often use it for meeting notes, lists for when I have too much rolling around in my brain, and for ideas for the future.

This is an add on page called “Fillable List”. I show below how I use it for meal planning.

I chose the Weekly Double Spread – Vertical 2. It was great for having three different sections of my life – School, Home & Social. I’m choosing a different one this year that I share below!

To sum it up, here’s exactly what I chose for this planner and what I’m choosing for 2023:

  • Neutral Linen Cover. Getting the exact same again. I’m either very boring or I just know what I like. lol.
  • I chose a Monday start page. I’m going to choose Sunday this year!
  • USA Holidays. Nice to have it all written in there for you.
  • This year I used Weekly Double Page – Vertical 2. For next year, I’m choosing Weekly Single Page – Horizontal 2. I didn’t realize this about myself, but now I know that I prefer looking at the week from the top down rather than from left to right. Not sure why, but I think I’ll like it better top down! I like that the week outline is on the left, and the whole right page is just for notes. I am a list maker at heart, so this is helpful for me.
  • Added Pages – I’m getting all the exact same this year. I loved these extra pages so much.
    • Year at a Glance 3 – Start of Planner – helpful to have a full year on one page to glance at. I like having all the dates listed out.
    • Month at a Glance – Monthly – I use this for blog and instagram planning. Lots of people wouldn’t need this one, but it helps me plan out a full month of ideas on a page. I like working by the month. And when you choose this, you get a blank page on the right of the page that I use for my monthly list. Bake, Treats, Projects, Cocktails, Meals to try, Crafts all go on this page to help me visualize the month ahead and actually Get Stuff Done.
    • Brain Dump – Monthly – Again, I’m a list maker. When I have a rush of ideas, I jot them all down on the “Ideas” page for the month. I can also use this page for meeting notes during the month.
    • Fillable List – 2 Monthly – For meal planning each week. I write the dates at the top and then I write down what I plan to make, what we need, etc. If you add two of these, that gives you 4 pages – enough for a month. And I like that they’re all right next to each other so I can look at what we had the previous weeks, or jot down things for the next week when I have meals on my mind.
  • Added Pages that I used this year and won’t be next year.
    • Holiday Gifting – Didn’t even glance at it once. I’ve been using a notebook for list making for the holidays, and am eliminating this year.
    • Weight/Measurements – Thought I might use. Didn’t even a little bit. lol.
  • New Added Page this year
    • Goals – Start of Planner – I love making new year goals, and this seems like a good little spread to have to think things through at the beginning of the year.

To sum it up – I am a Golden Coil for life user. You can use the code BLACKFRIDAY for 15% off through November 18th!

Things My Children Said This Week.

~ emetroka ~ Leave a comment

Someone put surveys in mailboxes at school to fill out and left a little thing of skittles to go with it so I ate mine in the car on the way to get the boys and immediately when Benny got in he said, “I smell candy. Mama can I have some candy?” Busted.

Me: Wow, Lukey really did a number on the playroom today, didn’t he?

Charlie: What number did he do? three hundred and twenty-eight?

Charlie: My teacher was sick today from all the talking.

Me: I can relate to her.

Charlie: I love you five hundred and sixty three miles per hour. I love you Ace. I love you four hundred and thirty two million feet.

Etc etc etc. 🥹