Well, I’ve only been marginally successful at my goal of daily blogging during the school year so far. I’ve been re-reading 168 Hours: You Have More Time Than You Think, by Laura Vanderkam, a fascinating book on how to make the most of your time by spending it on things that matter to you. I’ve determined that I absolutely have enough time to blog, care for my three kids, cook dinner every night, work full time, train for a marathon, meditate, learn spanish, bake on weekends and read at least one book for pleasure a week. haha. I know. That sounds ridiculous when you type it all out, doesn’t it? But people do it! It can be done! I’m going to do it, you guys. And then I’m going to share all of my secrets with you. This space though is one of those things that I know I can do with a little time.
Anyway – how was your week? The boys were at school all week, and I just went back yesterday, so it felt like a very fast week. We’ve been working out a few kinks (mainly in tender-hearted morning emotions), but overall it’s been good! The only thing dragging me down is that moment when my alarm goes off at 5am. I much prefer the yells of my children as an alarm clock.
Are you up to anything this weekend? I need to sit down with my husband tonight and discuss weekend plans over pizza and peach bourbon lemonades because as of yet, we’ve got nothing. A trip to the beach? A wander through the art museum? A kite flying expedition? A laze in the pool in our backyard? I don’t know, it’s going to be hard to choose between all those. We DO however, need to plant our pumpkin seeds because I’m hoping to have some homegrown Halloween pumpkins around here! Now, how about some fun links from around the web?
I’ve been looking forward to the newest episode of this show all week! Call me crazy, but I enjoy the old school excitement that comes from waiting for a new episode every week.
My friend just sent this video and I can’t stop giggling.
It’s here! It’s Friday! Hooray! SO very grateful that my parents were here this week. We took advantage of them like crazy. My car was in the shop all freaking week , so they drove the boys and I around, let me borrow their car when I needed it, made dinner every night, cleaned, done every little bit of laundry, entertained, and were just such a comfort to me. So thankful for them. Really can’t do any better than those two. I’m a lucky gal and I know it.
In other news, I signed Charlie up for Pre-K and soccer last week and I feel like we’re entering into a world of activities and kid stuff, and once it starts, I know it doesn’t end. Trying to soak up these days of just coming straight home from school to be in a little cocoon of a family. It will be good to get him involved in some other stuff – he’s totally ready, and I know Ben will be too once Charlie starts. But it’s a little bittersweet, ya know? Speaking of Ben, that kid, sheesh. He has been such a delight lately. You know how your kids go through phases where they’re like…really difficult and then suddenly you turn around and you’re totally enchanted by this tiny person that you created out of nothing? We’re in the latter phase right now, and gosh he has been so much fun. And oh yes, Lukey Lou is being a good boy too, now that you ask, despite waking at 4:50 on the dot this morning. His hair is getting curlier and curlier by the day, he says “wow” about everything, yells “mama” at everyone (including his dada), points to the tv and cries if we don’t turn blippi on, loves tromping around in the backyard in his rainboots, wants to be anywhere his brothers are, tells us when he poops in his diaper and gives the best hugs in (I’m pretty sure) the state, or maybe even the world.
This weekend we’re continuing to take full advantage of my parents and going on a freaking DATE tomorrow! I have a little excited smile on my face just thinking about it. Truly can’t remember the last date we’ve been on. And Sunday, of course, is the super bowl, so we’ve started working out a little list for the menu (so far it’s – tot-chos, meatballs, and dorito dip). And then Monday is Valentine’s day (that came up quick right??), so we need to bake something fun to celebrate. Ok, ok, I’m done spilling my guts now. How about some links from the week?
Oh gosh, I love books. I love thinking about them, reading them, talking about them. Every month I’m going to put my book reviews here so you can easily refer back to book suggestions. Click on the title to take you to amazon to see a summary of the book but as always, check your library first!! You can read all of these for FREE, and they often have the ebook if you’re more comfortable reading on a kindle or even on your phone. I’ll also put my top pick so that if you only get to one book during the month – you have an easy choice. I also always post book reviews and books that I’m thinking about on Mondays on my Instagram account.
My top pick for the month: The Paper Palace, by Miranda Cowley Heller (5/5)
I loved this one. Definitely my favorite of January. I’ve heard mixed reviews, and some definite red flags are the underlying themes of sexual abuse of minors. If you read a lot, then you know that this is common as it is in the world, but I could see why it wouldn’t be for everyone. I thought it was just such a well done story. I’d put it up there with The Dutch House by Ann Patchett, and Where the Crawdads Sing by Delia Owens. Both of those books have such a strong sense of place that I loved along with a family drama. Reminded me a little of Good Company – especially with the struggles of marriage and how your past and your untruths can catch up to you in the long run. Highly recommend reading this one. My favorite of the month.
Still thinking about this book even weeks after I finished it. I’ve heard that every one of Colleen Hoover’s books are amazing. I read Verity by her last year (which I also loved) and this one is so different, but has that same feel where you are just In. The. Story. I love reading books about relationships and thinking about the human experience. She does this so well.
I just…have a lot of thoughts on this book and I don’t want to give anything away, so if you read it – send me a message. I did love the nods to Greek mythology, so if you like that sort of thing, then you may like this. Not too scary, but definitely in the suspenseful mystery genre. I did NOT see the ending coming at all. I’ve heard that The Silent Patient is much better, so read that instead if you’re looking for this genre.
I enjoyed the close-knit community with secrets storyline, didn’t predict the ending, but also felt a little meh about the book overall once I finished it, and the ending was absolute garbage. Read if you like unreliable narrators with a bit of suspense/mystery.
Suspenseful in a non-scary way. Enjoyed the chapters being told from alternate perspectives and the setting in London. But I also found myself wanting to skip some of the chapters to get to the actual action. Some of it was a little repetetive, and if you are a big historical fiction junkie, I wouldn’t call the storyline exactly believable. It was all a little too…convenience. I’ve read better books, but I did take the time to finish the whole thing, so it couldn’t have been that bad. Another note – I did try to listen to the audiobook to get through it faster and it was truly horrendous. If you are short on time, save yourself and skip this one altogether.
I was going to do one Day in the Life post, but after starting to write, I have found that I need to break it up. I’m so chatty and explain-y! There is after all somewhat of a science to getting out the door in a orderly and not-pulling-your-hair-out fashion with three small children before 6:45am. I’ll do three posts over the next few weeks. This one is a typical morning for us, next week I’ll do a School Day in the Life if you’re curious about my school librarian gig, and then I’ll finish it up with An Evening in the Life. Maybe I’ll even do A Weekend in the Life? But you might be so bored to tears by then that I may have to skip it.
5am – My alarm begins to bong. I recently switched the setting to Timba and I find it a little less jarring than what I used to use. Sencha I believe? Feels more like I’m an extra in Tarzan and I don’t hate it. The first thing I do is make my way to the kitchen to put the water on to boil for coffee (we make ours in a french press and if you haven’t tried french press…well you’re missing out), then comes emptying the dishwasher, packing lunchboxes, getting breakfast ready, switching the laundry if I forgot to the night before, and getting my own stuff ready for school if I didn’t the night before. Typical breakfasts are cereal, frozen pancakes, french toast sticks, oatmeal, a baked good if we have it, (all of the above with sprinkles added if they need urging to eat), or, of course, the occasional refusal of all of the above in favor of…not eating breakfast at all.
Things can easily devolve here during this critical morning prep time if everyone wakes up really early, but on an ideal day, after everything in the kitchen is ready to go and I have a mug of hot coffee in my hand, I get myself ready before the boys get up. But in the spirit of full disclosure, I would say that on 3 to 4 days a week (aka…most days), one or another wakes before I’m ready. On those days, I wake my husband up and I hand that one off to him. Ben (2) is typically the first one up and he requests warm milk and a show so they’ll snuggle on the couch until another kid wakes up too. Favorites morning shows are: searching the term “construction trucks” on youtube and watching trucks move dirt, searching “recycling trucks” – there’s some great compilations of trucks picking up trash, sometimes Blippi, sometimes Pokoyo, and sometimes just yelling that he doesn’t want “that one”. lol…gotta love the whims of two year olds. Luke (15 months) is next up, and I take care of him if Ben is already up snugging with the best husband on earth. Luke gets a bottle, a new diaper, dressed in his school clothes right away, then a snuggle and sent to destroy things in the playroom.
6am – Now it’s time to wake anyone who isn’t already up – namely, Charlie (4). I usually start the wake up process at about 5:55. This includes, turning on the light in the family room, opening the door (Ben and Charlie share a room, and we’re toying with the idea of tossing Luke in there too soon – but we may have lost our marbles), and then turning off their sound machine. I give them about five minutes and this generally does the trick. If they’re still slumbering like angels, then I go in for phase two of wake up and rub their little backs, sing a wake up song, and give them another few minutes to roll around. The last step, or code red you really must get up as I like to think of it, is to turn on the light on their room. I try to avoid this as it can really be not a very nice mama move to those sensitive morning eyes. But! We’re not here to be nice, are we? And then, of course, first stop is to the potty when they wake up.
6:10 – Get the heathens, I mean boys, dressed, if they aren’t already. I try to have clothes laid out the night before and set it in the playroom so it’s easy to find everything. There is nothing I loathe more than searching through laundry for socks first thing in the morning. It is enough to put me in a foul mood for the rest of the day. Now…getting them dressed can be a touchy thing. Sometimes they don’t want to get dressed. Sometimes they don’t want it to be a school day. Me either, dudes. So to soothe their big emotions stuck inside their tiny frames, I try to be flexible. This looks different for each kid. For Luke, as mentioned above, he is happiest if he drinks his bottle while getting a new diaper and getting dressed. He doesn’t really get a choice. For Ben, the most difficult morning child, he is easiest if we get him dressed while he’s slightly distracted and still watching his little morning show. For Charlie, it depends. He often likes to get dress while in our room on our bed, sometimes he likes to do it himself, sometimes he likes help. In most cases, it’s all about the time. It could take fifteen minutes to get them dressed, or it could take two. If they’re having a hard time, and don’t want to get dressed yet, I leave them and I move on to something different (making their beds, making our beds, finishing my hair or makeup if it needs it), and then come back after a few minutes. Sometimes they just need to feel like they’re in control for a few minutes. Sometimes they just want dada to do it instead! Sometimes they want to listen to a Laurie Berkner or Caspar Babypants song on my phone. I try to be flexible. And I have definitely learned this the hard way. I remember feeling so very frustrated with Charlie because he would often refuse to get dressed in the morning and then we would both wind up upset, and late. Now, I give him a few minutes, then come back to him, and try to give him choices if he needs them.
6:20 – Now it’s time for breakfast which is already sitting out on the table, so they just go to eat whenever they’re ready or around 6:20 when we say it’s time to stop doing whatever they’re doing because we have to eat and get out the door soon. Breakfast is smooth if not a little silly. My husband always sits with them while they eat breakfast and at this point I go finish getting myself ready if I haven’t already. Hair, makeup, etc. If I’m ready, then I sit and eat breakfast with them.
6:35 – Brush teeth and vitamins. Easy – they love their vitamins and they know they only get their vitamin if they brush their teeth. Pairing works really well for us. Feels a little like bribery sometimes, but they need to take a vitamin, and they need to brush their teeth, so it’s really just a win-win here.
6:40 – We declare “ok! time for school! Lunchboxes and to the car!” Luke looooooves his lunchbox, so he trots out the door right away (and his little legs pumping out the door dragging his lunchbox next to him might be my favorite part of the morning), Ben often stalls if he’s playing with something, in which case – he gets to take that toy to the car with him. Again, feels like bribery, but it really works for him and we both get what we want. Compromise here. Charlie is pretty easy to get out the door, but can often play around when we get to the car. He puts himself in his own carseat in the back and loves to do it, so we do a lot of counting to three with him. “I’m going to count to three, and if you’re not in your seat by the time I get to three, then I’m going to put you in your seat for you.” I use this a lot in the afternoons too if he’s being squirrely. Counting to three does absolutely nothing for Ben, so to each his own. Ben gets to eat a squeezy yogurt when he gets into his carseat, and that does it for him.
Another thing that really works for us at any point in the morning are “Special Mama Hugs”. I use these more in the afternoon, but in the morning if anyone is losing it, I will say, “do you need a special mama hug?” And this generally stops them in their tracks and they nod yes. This means dropping everything we’re doing, me being wholly focused on the child who is struggling and I pick them up for an extra long, tight hug. Works wonders during times of overwhelm. It’s just a little moment of connection to reset. Like – ok, let’s take a minute, forget what we’re struggling with, and just hug. it. out. Charlie now will even ask for one if he knows he’s getting too upset or emotional.
6:50 – We must be on the road. It takes about fifteen minutes to get to the boys school, and I cannot stand for lateness so to get me to school on time (by 7:30), this is what it takes. For whatever reason, I didn’t care a bit about being late when I was pregnant with each of the boys (I think pregnancy can make us a little selfish, as it should. We’re one with the baby, and our bodies need all of our attention.), so I had several phases of being late to school every day, but I’m past that. We listen to Caspar Babypants radio on Pandora in the car, a story podcast (favorites are Circle Round and Little Stories for Tiny People), or sometimes if moods are sour, I will put PJ Mask on my phone on the Netflix app and prop it up in the middle of the seats so they can watch.
7:05ish – Arrive at daycare. We always call it “school” just to get them ready for school and the idea that school is fun, etc. And of course, we also call their minders teachers too! I think it’s good to get that mentality that you must listen to your teachers instilled really early. Charlie and Luke have always been happy to go to school and they love walking from the car to the door. Ben can sometimes take some urging. If he needs extra hugs or attention, I will sometimes take Charlie and Luke in and come back for Ben. Lately, hasn’t been much pushback on getting from the car to the door though. They don’t even look back at me when they’re going through the door. lol. I generally call my goodbye’s and “I love you’s and ok I’ll miss you’s to their backs. At one point, this would have made me sad. But now, I’m just glad that they love their school.
7:15 – I arrive at school and the second leg of my day begins. My School Day. Eeeeeee. Come back to see “A School Day in the Life” next week!
Welcome to a tiny corner of the internet! Things are just getting up and running around here, but you can expect to see posts on food, books, motherhood, marriage, home, librarian-life and the like. Most of you have probably found yourselves here from my Instagram account (which if not, here’s the link!) and if you’re familiar with what I post there – you know what to expect here. And if not – go see! But the problem I’ve been finding is that it can be really hard to sum up an idea in a single instagram post or story.
I’ve also been pondering the idea of routine lately, especially as it’s the beginning of a new year. What do I choose to include in my everyday routine? And what is just purposeless filler for the empty spaces that pop up? I want this spot to become an intentional part of my routine. This check in to share how we’ve been seeking joy lately, if we’ve been slowing down, or if we need to. To share what we’ve been cooking, making, baking, celebrating, doing, and perhaps most importantly, a bit of memory-keeping for years down the line when I know I’ll be happy to have everything here in a neat little package. And just maybe a few of those things might inspire you too. Let’s sift through all the noise of the world, and keep the good stuff we’ve found.
All those things currently live in a vault in my mind, and a little (seriously, such a tiny) glimpse into our days can be seen on Instagram, but with a website, everything can all be laid out here in a scroll-able, readable, categorized date-stamped format which is such a joy to a librarian such as myself. To sum it up: expect to see this space as a reference, an idea space, a daydream, a mindful reflection, a supportive community, and a guide for each season of life. I think it could become so good, you guys. And I’m so dang glad you’re here to see it. I hope you stay a while to see what it becomes.
The Metroka Family 